Saturday, July 16, 2016

Philosophy Vs Spirituality

A : Why are you reading all that life complicating stuff ? Read Ramayana and Bhagavatha instead..They would give you peace and happiness..I'm telling you,they are good for you...
B : But those are 'Rule books' right !!
A : What ?
B : Yeah,'Rule books'..They simply teach you 'How one must live an ideal life'..
A : I didn't get you..
B : See I'm neither talking about good or bad nor referring to any religion...I would like to experience life's darkness and brightness,both on my own..It's just I want to find my own meaning...However the good books in your opinion must have written by someone out of their experiences right !..You know Camus once told that 'man is the only creature on earth who denies his own nature'...So I prefer finding it out from every possible way instead of following Rule books..
A : You never change !!
B : No,you are wrong,I'm prone to change every single second...

Friday, June 17, 2016

Dark Star:The loneliness of being Rajesh Khanna - Gautam Chinamani

Blessed are the hearts that can bend; they shall never be broken." - Albert Camus. 

These popular Camus words summoned up into my mind after completing the book,'Dark Star-The loneliness of being Rajesh Khanna',written by Gautam Chinamani..In my schooldays,I happened to watch Anand for the very first time on TV..Though I'm not old enough to understand all that serious existential sort of stuff at that moment,this movie gave me an entirely different perspective on life..Must say,it introduced an unfamiliar sense of life to a 14 year old quite eloquently..Perhaps that's the very first time I sensed 'death',and thus I sensed 'life'..Till that moment I'm unaware of the word 'melancholy'..The face behind that experience was none other than Rajesh Khanna's,no wonder I made him my idol that instant..Later,driven by that madness,I started writing a diary in which the first page starts with his lines from my all time favourite song "Dil jane mere sare bhed ye gehre.. hogaye kaise mere sapne sunehre"..:) Though I'm a hard core fan of Big B,Khanna is someone special,who is so dear to my heart (Not to forget Hrishikesh Mukherji here)..Briefly that's my Rajesh Khanna story.
Image courtesy Google
Whosoever are familier with the phenomenon of Rajesh Khanna,if they happened to read this work,they would definitely feel the constant clash between the images of their idol 'The Rajesh Khanna' and a very ordinary human being next door 'Jatin Khanna'..The book widely discussed the Super star's film career,a journey of shocking ups and downs..Mostly the author shed light on the 'human being' behind the 'Superstar' image..In this we would be acquainted with an entirely different human being from his screen image,an insecure,jealous and complex Khanna..But if we examine his life in a different perspective,we don't easily jump to conclusions and brand him as an arrogant/bad person..Instead we'll realize the fact that he is as childish and insecure as any other ordinary human being,just like us..That simply makes us love him even more,the real Rajesh Khanna behind the Superstar...We would learn from the bitter experiences of the man for leaving his success,jealousy and insecurities unguarded..In this work,all his movies were discussed briefly along with the story plot and the foreword by Sharmila Tagore is brilliant and justifying..
She says "I am glad that at last there is a book on Rajesh Khanna. If ever a Hindi cinema star deserved a book, it is surely he."
The easy flow and narration broke my regular habit of noting down all my favourite lines from reading,however I managed to note down a few...

Goutam Chintamani-Image courtesy Google
Here are few lines from the book..
Describing him as someone with the ‘charisma of Rudolph Valentino, the arrogance of Napoleon’, the BBC’s documentary Bombay Superstar (1973) reinforced the tag that Khanna had got used to.

‘Saawan Kumar through Sahir's lines : 'Le de kar fakat ek nazar hi to hai humare paas; kyon dekhen zindagi ko kisi ki nazar se?’ (I had made my films the way I saw life. Why would I ever choose to see things from someone else’s perspective?)

From epilogue...The essence..
Every time Khanna made an overseas trip, he returned with gifts. Sometimes he presented them to the people he had picked them up for and sometimes he forgot about them. Many a time, he didn’t even bother opening the suitcases he returned with. After his death, almost sixty-four unopened suitcases were found strewn across Aashirwad – quite odd for someone who loved to play the host and lived to regale people he considered close. Rajesh Khanna’s loneliness was not something that was locked or hidden from sight. Neither was it a burden left behind by unprecedented fame. As is evidenced by the unopened boxes, it was possibly ingrained deep within him. Locked up in the suitcase of his heart was the need to be alone – something that had always existed. But the world was either too blinded by the radiance of the star or too lost in the darkness surrounding it to notice.

Monday, June 6, 2016

39th Chennai Book Fair-2016

The grand Chennai book fair that was to be held January was postponed for the first time in 38 years due to heavy floods in November..But instead a semi Pongal book fair was held in January this year with around 250 stalls...So here again,after a long time wait The Chennai book fair was started from 1st June and will be held till 13th of June..This time also it is organized in a grand scale with 700 stalls..We visited it yesterday and bought few more books,mostly for my kiddoo..So regarding books it's double pleasure this year..We were there at sharp 11 am,opening time and had a really great time visiting each and every stall to our hearts content..As usual most of the stalls were Tamil books..Children book trust has a very wide range of books with reasonable prices..

Here are few pics from the day,
Copyright A Homemaker's Utopia
Copyright A Homemaker's Utopia
My little hero busy exploring.. :)
Copyright A Homemaker's Utopia
Copyright A Homemaker's Utopia
Copyright A Homemaker's Utopia
Our loot this year :)
Copyright A Homemaker's Utopia
A few from Gita press for the first time..
Copyright A Homemaker's Utopia
Copyright A Homemaker's Utopia

Monday, April 11, 2016


She is like the other half of the moon..
Dark and dusky some times..
Bright with light sometimes..
Whoever she is..she says 'no' to all my wishes..
And always asks me questions..
Why do you think you are sane..while you'd love to hang out with me..?? She says...
I couldn't ignore her..For I loved her as much as I hated her..
Her presence gives me a strong sense of self,
but also throws me in to an abyss of isolation..
We are in conflict with each other all the time..
Yet she is essential to my identity..
She is like my own shadow I couldn't get rid of..
Poor me..I'm too tired and gave up trying..
I have no other way but to embrace her...
For I need to feel complete now..
Image courtesy Google

Wednesday, March 9, 2016

Then I found books..

Any sort of expression in it's most sincerest form is irresistible..I would love to listen to people who speak their mind with all honesty...A pure expression of despair,joy,sadness or not to mention,it could be bad vibes,but what ever,that honesty in expressing themselves always appear quite  fascinating for me..But these days everyone is trying their level best to be the best version of themselves in front of society..Needless to say we afraid of revealing our true selves to others because they might take advantage..So we usually put our best smile on,although our life is a complete mess some times..I know,I'm not an exception though..Then I stopped indulging in formal,forcible and meaningless talks...But who else could have the most passionate and tempting tales to tell us other than people..
And thennnnnnnnnnnnnnn,I found books...
Image courtesy Google

Thursday, March 3, 2016

Norwegian Wood - Haruki Murakami

These Japanese authors I've read so far,their novels have a unique way of narration..From Yasunari Kawabata to Kazuo Ishiguro,and now Haruki Murakami,every write-up has an undercurrent of a certain calmness and sadness..When you start reading these novels,initially nothing much appears exciting or soul stirring..In most of the plots,always the agitation stays in the background..And the foreground is beautifully trimmed by simple talks...I mean very simple..You never get to know when you are falling into a ravine all of a sudden because the calmness is surprisingly seasoned by intense emotions and Catch 22 situations..
Image courtesy Google
'Norwegian wood' is one such beautifully crafted story by Japanese author Haruki Murakami..This is the story of Toru Watanabe,our protagonist,studying in Tokyo..He stays in a dormitory in Tokyo with Nagasawa,an intense narcissist and friend of him..Toru spends most of his free time with his best buddies Naoko and Kizuki...This group of three was inseparable..Naoko and Kizuki share a very rare relationship..They are in love since their childhood..Toru narrates his experiences as a student and his simple life in dormitory..Everything goes well until the sudden suicide of Kizuki and also Kizuki's sudden demise takes a toll on Naoko's mental health..Then Toru tries to help her to overcome her sadness in asylum..Meanwhile he deeply fell in love with her and he keep visiting her frequently..Sometime it appears like he is taking advantage of her vulnerable condition but Toru feels  like Naoko is his responsibility after Kizuki's death...Reiko,the guitarist and Naoko's close companion in asylum become friends with Toru...Toru's assurances and support helps Naoko's recovery...But there comes Midori,a fellow student of Toru,and her entry in his life brings an unexpected turn in Toru's life..The remaining story is all about that clutch..

Coming to the characters Naoko and Midori looks like two opposite sides of a coin..Naoko is calm, soft and full of sadness where as Midori is crazy and full of life..Nagasawa is one more interesting character full of narcissistic ideas..Toru's life is a constant depiction of clash between morality and practicality..He has to choose between either sides..
There are few concepts which I don't like or I fail to understand but altogether it is a wonderful read..

Here are few interesting lines from the book..
Nagasawa. He was a far more voracious reader than me, but he made it a rule never to touch a book by any author who had not been dead at least 30 years."That's the only kind of book I can trust," he said. "It's not that I don't believe in contemporary literature," he added, "but I don't want to waste valuable time reading any book that has not had the baptism of time. Life is too short..
Balzac, Dante, Joseph Conrad, Dickens," he answered without hesitation."Not exactly fashionable."       "That's why I read them. If you only read the books that everyone else is reading, you can only think what everyone else is thinking..
Nagasawa is beyond liking or not liking. He doesn't try to be liked. In that sense, he's a very honest guy, stoic even. He doesn't try to fool anybody.
"I'm just an ordinary guy - ordinary family, ordinary education, ordinary face, ordinary exam results, ordinary thoughts in my head.""You're such a big Scott Fitzgerald fan... wasn't he the one who said you shouldn't trust anybody who calls himself an ordinary man? You lent me the book!" said Naoko with a mischievous smile.
"What makes us most normal," said Reiko, "is knowing that we're not normal.
I probably still haven't completely adapted to the world.' I said after giving it some thought. "I don't know, I feel like this isn't the real world. The people, the scene: they just don't seem real to me."
I don't know you well enough to force stuff on you.""You mean, if you knew me better, you'd force stuff on me like everyone else?""It's possible," I said. "That's how people live in the real world: forcing stuff on each other."
Death exists, not as the opposite but as a part of life."
What I learned from her death was this: no truth can cure the sadness we feel from losing a loved one. No truth, no sincerity, no strength, no kindness, can cure that sorrow. All we can do is see that sadness through to the end and learn something from it, but what we learn will be no help in facing the next sadness that comes to us without warning.

Wednesday, February 24, 2016

Wild Cries..

So many minds..So much of thinking..
Pouring opinions all around..
Political,religious,national...What not ! the list is endless..
So much of conflict..So many verdicts..
Nobody is here to listen to your unique fact nobody cares..
Everyone is here for 'approval' of their own cries...
So many views...So many voices...So many vibes..
In the end every voice is going to melt away in the endless noise..
Image courtesy Google

Thursday, February 4, 2016


Turning every page...reading every chapter...
Immersing myself in to the deep ocean of words..
I was looking for someone..
Some stranger from faraway places...
But wherever I go I found her right before me..
Every time smiling and asking,"Do you remember me ?"
I was perplexed and said "No" and moved on..
Image courtesy Google

Friday, January 8, 2016


Her thoughts flow in to the streams of linguistic disorders..
Like a wild fall from the misty mountains..
The two weird streams from the same origin aspiring to unite in an orderly channel..
Forsaken and flake off,deceived by her own duality..
The wild flow is insignificant in the infinite calm sea...
Image courtesy Google

Tuesday, December 22, 2015

Manali - Himachal Pradesh

Our next stop from Manikaran was Manali via Kullu..As we were already acquainted with the most interior and rural Himachal,(Sangla and Chitkul) Manali appeared to be a bit commercialized and crowded place when compared to those,nevertheless it was as awesome as any other place in Himachal with wonderful sceneries..The best thing about Manali is Bias river quietly flowing on one side of the road..
Here we go with the pics..
Manali main street..

The most popular Hadimba temple...

Man with Yak...

Vashishta temple..

This is the view from our cottage..

Bias river

Some strange fruits called Persimmon fruits or Japani fruits..

We had our dinners in Chopsticks restaurant during our stay..The Chinese food is very delicious here..

Women with Angora rabbits...